🩷 From thriving to surviving… and back again

I’ve always struggled with the concept of being visible and ‘standing out’; all eyes on me? Noooo thank you, can I do the whole ‘creating a personal brand’ in a non personal way instead please?

You see, I’m a twin. All me and my sister heard growing up was that we were “exactly the same.” Family and friends telling us they couldn’t tell us apart, constantly asking “which one is which?”; while they saw it as a novelty, it didn’t sit right with me. I just didn’t know how to voice it, good girl conditioning at its best.

I longed to be seen as me  – not simply as “one of the twins”, as much as I love being one.

As I worked on myself in adulthood, healing the people pleaser I me plus showing conditioning and the patriarchy the door… I began to realise that I am me, and I am unique – even as an identical twin.

But with this growth came further realisations and challenges…

Three years ago, my marriage broke down; I finally saw things as they were, and decided I was worth more.

My life and business ventured through an extreme rollercoaster of a journey, with my visibility non-stop switching between on and very much off. I joined business memberships, pushed myself to speak on stage, networked, pivoted and more. No matter what I tried, I still felt disconnected from my purpose.

The reason? While I was healing and discovering who I truly was, I was still in circles that belonged to the old version of me — the version I no longer aligned with. My emotional turmoil was exhausting enough, anything on top of this had to be put in hold.

I was tired — emotionally, physically (the joys of entering perimenopause) and spiritually.

I also became tired of:

• Online BS, overnight success stories, and blatant “look at me on a yacht” tactics being used by people making money out of telling others how to make money 🤔.

• The endless hustle culture and “pay-to-play” schemes.

• People pretending everything in their life and business is fine when it was anything but.

• Leaders only being interested in connection when money changed hands.

Tired, overwhelmed, low in energy- I intentionally chose to bow out and hold back. Truth is, I almost gave up.

What was the point of fighting to be seen when I didn’t want to be? 

And also, why continue to hustle and show up if I can’t show up with integrity and authenticity… feeling the ‘ick’ any time I even attempted to show up like everyone else.

In my social solitude, I realised something pretttttyyy profound- something I’ve always known but never fully embraced: That I don’t have to show up their way. I never have done. I could create my own path — soulfully, strategically, and unapologetically as me.

That’s why I created Stand Out Soulfully: to help women like me and you to step into their true selves, share their voice, and grow their business in a way that feels aligned, joyful, and impactful.